Thursday, December 31, 2009

it is now...2010! at least according to my clock. other people disagree.

Hi guys. Or..yknow, fictional readers.
Anyways, on my computer it now says it's 12:02 which means its officially TWO THOUSAND AND TEN. Or not, since my good friend Chenny says its in 10 seconds. 10..9..8..7..6..5..4..3..2..1.. Happy New Year. Or (and this is exactly what he wrote):
WELCOME 2010!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, he's somehow turned into Santa. Nevermind.
(and no, I don't go to fancy New Year's parties. No, instead I stay home and write blog posts. How exciting! *glare.* *glare.*)

So this post isn't just about the new year and weird boys in my class.
Basically, Mimi promised you guys a post on our trip to the cobbled streets of NLGX and so far we've failed to deliver. Not that there's anyone to deliver TO since nobody reads this, but still. We felt we had to explain.
It goes like this:
Chinese government blocks Blogger.
Children use internet proxies to access Blogger.
Government blocks internet proxies.
Children download VPN's.
Government blocks VPN's.
Children find miraculously unblocked proxies.
Said proxies won't let you put pictures in posts.
Children despair and don't post NLGX post because without pictures, it's just not as good.

There. Story of our lives.

So. Au Revoir.


Monday, December 28, 2009

far far away and out of sight

i think it's now appropriate to mention School. we go back in 6 days...i'm counting down. let us keep the moment far far away and out of sight (jimmy page moment)...

i would do a post on back to school outfits, but it's impossible for hanomi cuz we have a strict uniform.............



(this was a draft written by the ever punctual naomi so in a fit of boredom, I've decided to publish it. without her permission. yes. from, hannah)

lovely lovely winter sales...

Hey, non-existent readers…
It’s that time of year again…or just after anyway. Though the official Christmas may be over, for me it’s just begun. Winter sales are in full bloom – Uniqlo (Japanese brand) has sales of up to 60%. Mango (Spanish brand) up to 50%, and with so much price reduction I actually went in and bought a sweater there. My first very first Mango garment. It wasn’t anything fancy, just a slim fit black V-neck that I will use for school instead of the regulation scratchy off-black ones (my school has a uniform; blazer, tie, the whole deal). There was also this very large, very shiny cuff-type bangle with little spikes in Mango, but I’d run out of money...luckily, there’s always tomorrow. Speaking of tomorrow, my fellow blog partner and I are going to venture into the bit of our city with all the narrow streets cool rockers…and Fish Nation, one of our many our saviors. The stores are very unique, lots of up-and-coming local boutiques and music stores where hopefully we will find a bass guitar for Hannah.

Ciao for now, Naomi

Saturday, December 26, 2009

in which crystal renn completely outmodels poor jacquelyn jablonski

So, have you guys seen the new issue of V Magazine? Me neither. But some photos are online, and I thought I'd put them up. Of course, this is old news to most of you as they've been all over the internet.

See what I mean? Even without all the 'plus size' hype, Crystal Renn is a great model. She just exudes power and confidence, even in the face of Jacquelyn Jablonski's special 'model stare' where they just squint. And, when I first saw the shoot my eyes went straight to Crystal. That's not to say that Jacquelyn isn't a great model, just Crystal is more...there.
This picture to the left is my favourite. Crystal doesn't need to pose exaggeratedly to kid the viewer into thinking she has curves. Basically, she rocks. End of.
The shoot proves that advertisers and fashion houses dont NEED super skinny, barely there models to wear their clothes. Because, as you can see, Crystal wears the clothes just as well as her skinnier counterpart.
By the way, I'm on a first name basis with these models. 'Cause, yknow, they regularly hang around Beijing international schools.
(For the humor-challenged people out there, that was a joke)
Zai Jian,

Christmas is all around you..and so the feeling grows!

If you really love Christmas, Come on and let it snow! There was no snow on my Christmas Day, seeing as I was in sunny Taiwan. Yay.

Fortunately that meant I was getting good presents as contrary to popular opinion, Taiwan is the best shopping destination *jeremy clarkson pause* the world.

Yes that's right. A tiny island nation that some say is part of China has the worlds best shopping.

So when I (metaphorically) ripped the wrapping paper off my presents, I was sure that it would be good. *Jeremy Clarkson pause* ...I was right.

I now had in my posession a pair of red wayfarer glasses with clear lenses and I was in love! For about ten seconds until my dad laughed at me (my own father!) and my brother keeled over, choking. My other presents were ripped grey jeans, a checked coat with zipper hems (!!), a red coat, a mini laptop, and a japanese magazine that I can't read-I truly am cursed when it comes to magazines. Why can't I speak Japanese?! WHY OH WHY

Some pictures of it's incredible oddness:

How many Vogue editorials would have a bespectacled model biting into a huge bar of chocolate in the Accesories section? More to the point, see the awesome name? FUDGE. LIKE THE FOOD. I mean, I'm sure none of the models inside have ever actually EATEN fudge judging by their thinness, but still, what a cool name. It evokes memories of fudgie-ness. It's not often a magazine does that.
Before I finish, I'd just like to apologise for the despicable quality of the photos. And also my Top Gear references. That show is addictive, I tell you, addictive. Also, if there are any fellow Top Gear fans, just go to Youku and type in Clarkson Island. Then laugh.

Thank you, thank you very much,


*by the way, the title and first sentence of this post are from a very, very special movie. Love Actually, starring the completely fantastic Bill Nighy!

Friday, December 25, 2009

the courage and complete insanity of old taiwanese women

Right now as it's the glorious Christmas holidays (or vacation as my American friends would say) I'm in Taiwan. We go almost every year cos my mum's parents are Taiwanese. Well, one of them is, my grandad came from China to Taiwan as a soldier and decided to stay. So romantic and heartwarming..
Anyway, because the whole holiday has been very family oriented, I've had a chance to see my great aunts, and my own grandmothers...interesting outfit choices. Interesting meaning completely, utterly, mind bogglingly INSANE.
I almost admire their complete disregard for convential outfit choices.
The night before last there was a whole family dinner, which as you can imagine was chaos squashed into one tiny dining room of a Japanese/Chinese seafood restaurant. If you ever meet my family you'll realise that organisation isn't really their strong point. Neither is ordering food, buying drinks and sorting out the drive home. But I love them, really! :P
So when my aunts arrived half an hour late and entered the room, I choked on my apple cider.
The shorter of the two, who is a PSYCHIC by the way (see my strange family?!) wore a jumpsuit.
But NO, it doesnt stop there! A red and white striped stretchy cotton jumpsuit.
Let me say, the PSYCHIC aunt is pushing 70. At least.
And apparently she covets my hair. Yes, definite sign of a crazy person. Naomster will back me up on that, because NO ONE covets my hair.
*puts on hat to hide bad haircut*
No one.



Jellyfish are Invertebrates (naomi's introduction)

Hello. My name is Naomi, and I am a struggling, aspiring fashion designer with not much hope, as well as the other half of this sad little blog. Please note that I have nothing to do with Hannah’s post, and I am strongly opposed to cheesy slogans.
Yes reader, you are thinking, ‘oh geez, another blog written my some lame kids somewhere’. Well, you think wrong. There are many things that set us apart for your average terrible fashion blog, for example:
1) We live in China, so we have different viewpoints on fashion – Western and East.
2) We also are interested in the arts, and culture, and academics. Not so much sports.
3) Yes, occasionally, we might write about something completely irrelevant, outdated, misinformed, or just plain boring (God forbid). But that’s what keeps it interesting, isn’t it?
4) Reading Vogue in Chinese is interesting. Having no clue what they write about (it’s in Chinese and we can’t get the English one unless we play grotesque amounts of money), we tend to concentrate more on the pictures. And isn’t a picture worth a thousand words?
So those, in a nutshell, are the main reasons why we might be worth reading.
Back to me for a bit - crazy dreams of mine include being a fashion journalist for Vogue, or running a boutique, or being an intern for a cool line.
I like fashion. Everyone should like it, same as everyone should like Led Zeppelin. If you don’t know what Led Zeppelin is, you better find out quick, or your life will be unfulfilled forever.
One last thing – I feel I should stress that contrary to my curly-headed friend’s belief, no one should take life advice from advertising. Ever. Please.


Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Welcome to our weird world

Hi. I'm Hannah. One half of this blog. The other half's called Naomi and she IS going to write another introduction for herself. Or else... *cue evil music*
Anyway, enough about that.
Me and Naomi (bad grammar, I know) started this blog basically 'cause we love fashion, style, and taking photos of ourselves wearing strange outfits where we look like idiots. It's a bit intimidating to start a blog but as wise Nike once said 'Just do it.'
I regularly take life advice from adverts, in case you were wondering.

Where we both live-China-the government has blocked certain sites. Sites like Facebook, Youtube, Twitter and...Blogger. So our posts may occasionally get erratic if our (life saving)proxies stop working or get blocked. Hopefully that won't happen and you'll get treated to our off-topic ramblings daily :P If this blog ever get's any readers.

So, about me. I'm a twelve year old girl in Year 8, trying to find a place in Beijing that sells clothes I can afford. Right now, I'm obsessed with The Beatles ever since discovering them again, and to a lesser extent Morrissey and Led Zeppelin. I buy magazines that I literally can't read because they're in Chinese and I waste most of my money on food, books and clothes. My craziest dream is to be a fashion designer. Unfortunately, my drawing skills don't extend to bodies, or faces and so most of the people in my drawings are faceless and slightly creepy.
Since none of that really relates to fashion, I also like Rodarte, the now deceased Phi, Haider Ackerman, Vivienne Westwood and MEGA MEGA Vintage, which isn't a designer but a vintage shop that I want to live in.

That's all for now, folks.